I heard the buzzer going off. It was 4:55 a.m. I couldn’t do this, this morning and I hit the snooze button.
Again, I heard that awful sounding noise ringing in my ears. This time I shut my alarm off. I decided I don’t have to run this morning, telling myself I can run at the gym later. Hmmm, hopefully if my day doesn’t get too busy? I convinced myself I’ve been training hard enough and it will be ok. It will be good for me to sleep some more. It’s repairing muscles, I’ll have more energy, it can also…ZZZZZ.
I awakened just five minutes later with thoughts of my busy day before me. Sitting in traffic, project deadlines, and reports was just a partial list. Then while I lie in my half slumbering state full of misery, one person entered my head, “Brendan”.
This morning you are starting another chemo cycle, getting an IVIG infusion while meeting multiple doctors. And that is one of your easier days at the JFC (see Another snow day,YAY!!). Today you should be getting up and going to school, complaining about too much homework and heading over your friend’s house to play in the snow. Yet, in the 5 weeks I’ve gotten to know you, I have never heard a complaint. Each time you talk about your ordeal, you do so in a positive way.
I don’t’ know if you realize at such a young age how inspiring you are to people. You are strong, thoughtful and refreshingly optimistic.
Somewhere over time, we as adults tend be become more cynical in life. I’m not sure when and why that happens. We weren’t always this way. I think we need to be shown by people like you to be mindful of the moment and to enjoy life.
Today I pledged to myself to stop complaining, at least about things I love to do. I enjoy running. I’m not supposed to look at it as a job or a chore to do each day. It should be like more like watching my favorite television show or eating a big bowl of cookie dough ice cream. I’ll even try to be more positive on the weather. Yeah, remind me of that one after Saturday’s snow storm!
I hope today went well at the JFC and I’ll see you tonight.
RM: 9.75 (Raynham’s Random Run)